[ there's no hesitance in the answer, but it's pained. ]
I wanted to. Zhongli... he trusted the angels, at least. I tried, but it's happened too many times now. Even so... I still want to have a little hope. It can't all die out.
Please don't talk about protecting me. It doesn't... go well. [ wow he hates thinking about this. okay ] But... thanks, Kaworu. You matter to me, too. I'm glad I got to meet you.
[He can not talk about protecting. He can do it and not talk about it. But being told that he matters just... cracks something in him. His eyes start to burn and so he raises his free arm to cover his eyes as he starts to tears start to run down his cheeks and his thin shoulders shaking with little suppressed sobs. Just allergies, obviously. He's fine.]
immediately, chrono draws ahead of him, still holding their hands between them.
he's not sure about kissing him, the same way he had at the party. there's a reason he hasn't brought it up as promised. there's nerves there, to set some expectation for someone like kaworu, who still wasn't sure of himself, whose emotions were still finding their proper places in his heart.
but. he'll wrap his free arm around kaworu's shoulders, press his mouth to the crown of his head instead, and speak gently into his hair. ]
You didn't. I was glad to hear that I mattered to you. I'd never heard words like that before. And then suddenly there were tears even though I was happy. It's strange.
[Kaworu is a strange being for sure. He knows what he wants, confident and bold, and yet even gentle words can sometimes shatter him.
The forehead kiss is so gentle and sweet that the tears stop and he just looks up at the other boy, wishing he could convey his affection through the air like he did last week.]
[ it's kind of shocking, with the way kaworu speaks, that no one else has at least given him that reassurance. but chrono's always been more honest and actionable about this kind of thing - it's why he's a good teacher, at his mundane little job. it's why he's a terrible liability, when things get dire.
he's not sure what's right to do here. kaworu is kind of like a child, still learning. not hearing that he mattered, during this time... it's a bit too familiar, as well. ]
...everyone who's made friends with you thinks that you matter. It's not always gonna be in words, but you'll see it in actions. The way Mr. Anders cares for you, the way you can talk so easily with everyone.
Anders said that I was important to him but it was after... everything in the Tavern. It didn't make me happy then. I just cared about him being alive. If I mattered to him or not wasn't important then.
[He would be a little horrified to know that Chrono thinks of him like a child. And he maybe gets a bit of the sense anyway because he straightens up and wipes his face, inhaling sharply as a way to get the tears to stop. Reeling in those emotions that vex him and upset others.]
[ ...oh, okay. he's more than a little sad, to see kaworu push things down. it's a painful thing to do, though he'd be hypocritical to act like he hasn't been doing the same for a long time. ]
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[ there's no hesitance in the answer, but it's pained. ]
I wanted to. Zhongli... he trusted the angels, at least. I tried, but it's happened too many times now. Even so... I still want to have a little hope. It can't all die out.
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[Just gives his hand a little squeeze.]
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Please don't talk about protecting me. It doesn't... go well. [ wow he hates thinking about this. okay ] But... thanks, Kaworu. You matter to me, too. I'm glad I got to meet you.
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[He can not talk about protecting. He can do it and not talk about it. But being told that he matters just... cracks something in him. His eyes start to burn and so he raises his free arm to cover his eyes as he starts to tears start to run down his cheeks and his thin shoulders shaking with little suppressed sobs. Just allergies, obviously. He's fine.]
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immediately, chrono draws ahead of him, still holding their hands between them.
he's not sure about kissing him, the same way he had at the party. there's a reason he hasn't brought it up as promised. there's nerves there, to set some expectation for someone like kaworu, who still wasn't sure of himself, whose emotions were still finding their proper places in his heart.
but. he'll wrap his free arm around kaworu's shoulders, press his mouth to the crown of his head instead, and speak gently into his hair. ]
Hey? It's okay. Man, I didn't mean to upset you.
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[Kaworu is a strange being for sure. He knows what he wants, confident and bold, and yet even gentle words can sometimes shatter him.
The forehead kiss is so gentle and sweet that the tears stop and he just looks up at the other boy, wishing he could convey his affection through the air like he did last week.]
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[ it's kind of shocking, with the way kaworu speaks, that no one else has at least given him that reassurance. but chrono's always been more honest and actionable about this kind of thing - it's why he's a good teacher, at his mundane little job. it's why he's a terrible liability, when things get dire.
he's not sure what's right to do here. kaworu is kind of like a child, still learning. not hearing that he mattered, during this time... it's a bit too familiar, as well. ]
...everyone who's made friends with you thinks that you matter. It's not always gonna be in words, but you'll see it in actions. The way Mr. Anders cares for you, the way you can talk so easily with everyone.
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[He would be a little horrified to know that Chrono thinks of him like a child. And he maybe gets a bit of the sense anyway because he straightens up and wipes his face, inhaling sharply as a way to get the tears to stop. Reeling in those emotions that vex him and upset others.]
Thank you Chrono.
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[ ...oh, okay. he's more than a little sad, to see kaworu push things down. it's a painful thing to do, though he'd be hypocritical to act like he hasn't been doing the same for a long time. ]
You don't have to thank me, y'know.
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[He squeezes Chrono's hand.]
I know. But I want to. It feels right. You give a lot to other people. And I want to give something back.